false

I have to apologise - I have been remiss in my blogging of late.  I have what I think is a pretty decent excuse though - I've been busy getting a brand new newspaper off the ground!  And yesterday, we saw our first 22,000 copies of The Regional (http://www.theregional.ca/) come off the presses.  It was  a pretty powerful moment - realizing that something we've created will soon be delivered to every home & business in Caledon.  Its been a load of hard work, and we are very blessed to have a great team around us to help get it all done (and remarkably understanding family and friends too, I might add).

But I digress: that isn't what this blog is about!  Its about having the courage of your own convictions and being honest - with yourself & others.

In one of those odd little twists where happenings in real life get a nudge from something outside your life, I have recently borne witness to a number of situations where people have dug themselves nasty little pits of despair in an effort to avoid something rather than just being honest and saying no in the first place.

The twist?  Well, there a lot of you reading this right now who know me well, and remember similar situations that I got MYSELF into.  You see, I am one of the worlds most poorly controlled "yes" women.  I hate letting people down - and so I end up taking on too much.  End result?  In an effort to honour all of my commitments, of course I end up letting someone down - usually myself or those closest to me. 

The "shoulda said no" scenarios I mentioned above could so easily have happened to me.  And that is what made each "cringe-worthy" situation doubly so.  

Why do we feel so terrible saying no?  It isn't an evil thing to do.  It doesn't kill puppies or drive a species to extinction. And we've all been on the receiving end of a big fat "NO" - and lived to tell the tale.  In fact, all saying "no" does is tell people plainly where you stand:
"No, I can't join that committee, I don't have time."
"No, I don't want to buy a time-share."
"No, I don't have any money to lend you."
"No, I don't really like that shirt,"   or even...
"No, I don't want dessert." (Like that ever happens, lol!)

But instead of being straightforward, so many of us try to "nice" our way around things, or worse yet - we say "yes" when we actually mean no.  I recently saw a quote that sums it up nicely, and which I will be posting somewhere I can see it often:

"A 'No' uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a 'Yes' uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble.” ~Gandhi

Trust Gandhi to cut through all the superflous nonsense and get to the heart of the matter. After seeing this quote, I have made an honest effort to be more true to myself, know my limits, live within them.  Which means, by default, I am saying no more often. Nicely.  And often with regret.  But I am saying it - because if I don't, I am not being true & fair to myself.  Could I be in danger of growing up, this close to the sunset in my 5th decade on this planet?  Perhaps it happens to all of us eventually.

What's that you say, dear reader? You'd like to read more about this?  Well, I'd like to write a longer post, but I really don't have the time today.  So with much regret, I'll have to say no.  I'm sure you understand?

:)